


Benefits

by ectoBisexual



Category: Free!, Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Anal Sex, Breathplay, Butt Plugs, Choking, Commission fic, Crossover, Denial of Feelings, Developing Relationship, Dirty Talk, Finger Sucking, Friends With Benefits, Lingerie, M/M, Oral Sex, Riding, Rimming, Rough Sex, Semi-Public Sex, Sugar Daddy, Video Cameras
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-14
Updated: 2016-04-14
Packaged: 2018-06-01 22:45:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 13,529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6539560
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ectoBisexual/pseuds/ectoBisexual
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It all started with a tie.<br/>.<br/>Makoto gets a sugar daddy. All doesn't go as planned.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to my commissioner, who wishes to stay anonymous! The first two chapter of this fic were written as one commissioned piece a while back and now, a whole year later, I've been commissioned to finish the whole thing. :) You're a pleasure to work with!
> 
> For anyone interested, my commission info is here: http://cloverguts.tumblr.com/post/129385688821/andys-emergency-commissions-please-take-2

It all started with a tie.

He had just[ started work](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4013059/chapters/9016873#92787301) for a big swim company that was offering multiple promotions, and itwas a suit and tie event. He lived with friends at the time; four of them all holed up in some cheapplace central to Tokyo's busiest area, barely scraping by on any[JOB](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4013059/chapters/9016873#30409275) he could get straight out ofcollege. He hadn't seen the guy, because he was too busy fumbling with a slim black tie that justwouldn't work with him. Makoto only knew so much about ties, from previous years of watchinghis mother's fingers move diligently over silk, from helping Haru with his school uniform whenthey were both running late. He kept fumbling. Then, slim brown fingers.

Erwin was a senior for the company but he was only 35. Suntanned, bony knuckles, strong, bigeverything; Makoto's heart had about leapt into his throat at the sight of the man,impossibly hot, leaning way too far into his comfort zone to help with his tie.

"You're going the wrong way," he had murmured, and Makoto hadn't been able to look anywherebut his mouth. "If you loop it through this way, the knot will be tighter." A pink tongue, dartingout to wet his lips. Makoto's heart had hammered.

They fucked that first night, only barely[ managing](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4013059/chapters/9016873#7706502) to tell each other their names before Makotowas being forced backwards into a tiny office. The floors were pretty much cleared, but peoplewere still milling about; Makoto had been thrilled at the idea of getting caught, a new, dark feelingsitting low and hot in his gut where it hadn't before. It was his first night in any big event for thecompany, and he could have been caught, the shameful intern bent over some big executive corpsdesk. They'd never let him work with children again, it would have been a[permanent mark](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4013059/chapters/9016873#31917801) on hisrecord. He could have cared, but opted instead for biting down on the other man's shoulder,stifling his cries as he was pounded into roughly.

Thankfully, they didn't, and even had enough time afterwards to exchange numbers and a cheesyporn-esque goodbye. Little did Makoto know that he would be seeing the man the very next week,and the week after that. Until it became habit. Paid habit.

He didn't exactly know who brought up the idea first, but Nagisa was thrilled.

"A sugar daddy!" he exclaimed. "Mako-chan has a sugar daddy! Incredible! Rei-chan, we never doanything wild."

"Are you suggesting I buy you expensive goods every time we have sex?" Rei inquired, quirking aneyebrow, and Makoto's whole face went red.

"It's really not like that," he whined, hiding his burning face in his hands. "We just... we're friends."

"Friends who fuck," Nagisa ammended, throwing back a too-large sip of cider that had Rei lookingconcerned. "Friends with benefits. One of who is rich as fuuuck."

"Whom," Rei corrected, but he was blushing.

"He's not rich," Makoto whined, but it was no use; the point was moot. Erwin was just kind ofgenerous, and had a habit of buying him nice things every time they had sex.

"Oh?" Nagisa implored, and very delicately reached out to pluck at the shirt Makoto was wearing."Say, Mako-chan, this is nice. Is it new?"

He said nothing.

It was a week after that one that he got the watch; not his style at all, but white[ gold](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4013059/chapters/9016873#18001266), the face ofwhich was nearly shiny enough to see his own reflection in. It couldn't have been a coincidence, acasual gift; he got it the morning after Erwin and he tried bondage for the first time.

He was beginning to feel a little like a[ commodity](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4013059/chapters/9016873#37398978).

It had been five months since they'd started. It wasn't as if Makoto wanted a relationship with theguy or anything-- no, he was perfectly content with their arrangement-- but he couldn't for thelife of him figure out what Erwin was getting out of the deal.

"Are you joking?" the older man lit a cigarette, peering at Makoto over the burning cherry red.

They were sitting on the balcony of his apartment, a much nicer place than Makoto's; it was hardlya job, but a few more months of this and Makoto would probably have enough money for a downpayment on a decent studio apartment. Something a little bigger that Haru would be thankful for,anyway. As if every move of his was plotted towards making his[ best friend's](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4013059/chapters/9016873#74398882) life easier. (It was.)

When he said nothing more, and only continued to stare back at Erwin, a vacant, unknowing stare,Erwin laughed.

Makoto had the breath kissed out of him. It was all tongue, a painstakingly deep, hot thing that hecouldn't help but moan into. Erwin didn't pull away until Makoto's cheeks were flushed red, his lipsglossy and swollen. The taller was smirking. "Look in a mirror some time, will you? I'm happy."

Suddenly they were kissing again, and Makoto was biting back on some of the whinier noises thatwanted to escape, squeezing his eyes shut and his arms around Erwin's shoulders. He was evenbroader than Makoto, a deliciously built thing to get wrapped up in. Erwin kissed like he meant it;deep, tantalising, and just on the edge of rough.

He laid Makoto down on the bed and immediately got to work, kissing down the hard lines of hisbody while Makoto gasped on some semblance of speech.

"I mean-- I still don't know why you-- ah."

Erwin's mouth had moved from his clavicle, a tongue circling Makoto's nipple. Unthinkingly hishand flew to cradle the back of Erwin's neck, fingers tightening in the[ short hair](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4013059/chapters/9016873#90340433) there.

"You could have anyone, and yet you--"

Erwin groaned, teeth skimming the sensitive pink flesh. Makoto's complaint tapered off into a highpitched gasp, his train of thought wishing to dissolve. Erwin's hands were circling his hips, playingat the zipper on his jeans.

"You--"

"Makoto," Erwin interrupted, and his expression was so hard and stern that Makoto shut up."You're thinking too much."

He sunk down Makoto's body. The other was having a hard time containing his gasps, hipsstuttering as he fought not to lift them.

Erwin mouthed at his length through the thin cotton material of his boxers, gaze burning intoMakoto's.

"If it makes this any easier," he said patiently, pulling the boxers down over Makoto's hipsand[ placing](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4013059/chapters/9016873#94036643) a perfunctory kiss right on the tip of his dick, "you can think of yourself like a sextoy."

Makoto's breath caught. "But-- I'm not--"

"If you even suggest that you're not desirable, Makoto, I'll stop," Erwin warns. Makoto doesn'tdoubt him; he keeps quiet, jaw tight, biting down on a whimper as Erwin sucks the head of hiscock right into the warmth of his mouth.

It didn't take long to prepare Makoto, and Erwin fucked him flat on his back, breathing harshlyinto his neck. It was always surprising to Makoto, how he could lose himself so easily in themotions. Erwin in him, around him, tight arms holding his wrists down and his whole body pinnedto the bed. Everything felt hot, and he was pretty sure he was moaning on every exhale now,keening towards the fast-snap build up of pleasure in his lower stomach.

"You have no idea," Erwin panted, hot breath[ spreading](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4013059/chapters/9016873#32944010) over the shell of Makoto's earand God, "how[ good](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4013059/chapters/9016873#6917615) you look. So good, Makoto-- so good for me."

Makoto's only answering noise was a moan, pushing his hips back[ to meet](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4013059/chapters/9016873#39108) Erwin's next thrust.Erwin groaned low in his throat,[SPEEDING](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4013059/chapters/9016873#77134924) up his motions. "Do you wanna come?" he asked,grunting the words into Makoto's ear; he was on a nonstop build up of shivering now, and couldonly answer in a whimper, tilting his head back, pushing his hips. "I could make you come likethis. Wouldn't even have to touch yourself, would you, you're so desperate for it--"

"Erwin." It was the only word that would come out. Garbled, forced, high; Erwin's hips snapped intohis hard.

"Shit. Yeah, that's it. You feeling good?"

"Erwin," he[ repeated](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4013059/chapters/9016873#98989829), feelings tears brimming in his eyes, feeling his blush move down to hisneck, then, "God, it's-- don't stop, please, I'm--"

"Shh," Erwin soothed, catching Makoto's lips in an open-mouthed kiss. The angle was awkward,and their teeth slammed together, but Makoto couldn't stop moaning, meeting Erwin's tongue withhis own, feeling drool slide down his chin. "Good boy, Makoto. You feel so good. Tight."

He reached a hand down to circle Makoto's cock; Makoto sobbed.

Barely three strokes later and he was coming, limbs feeling shaky and ready to give out. Erwin heldhim steady, thrusting hard into him and then stilling, biting down on Makoto's shoulder.

They lay together later, Makoto in boxers and one of Erwin's shirts, Erwin smoking again.

"Sex toy, huh," he said. Sex had left him boneless, a little more relaxed to tease. Erwin smirkedaround his cigarette.

"I said to think of it like that if it made it easier," he said, flicking ash. "Not that you're an object byany means. But I don't want our boundaries getting skewed."

"Of[ course](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4013059/chapters/9016873#25426344)," Makoto answered, patiently sipping at the coffee Erwin had made him. He feltimpish, though the cool atmosphere of the room was hard not to sink into, the walls thrummingwith his own sated exhaustion. "So, you buy me things, and I, um..."

"I'm not in love with you," Erwin said.

Makoto smiled, though he didn't meet his gaze. "That's a relief. I have someone else I like,anyway."

"Your roommate?" Erwin questioned, but Makoto was already moving on.

"I don't[ mind](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4013059/chapters/9016873#8086737). Being a sex toy, I mean. I like being with you, and as long as you take my, um,wishes into consideration, then--"

"Of[ course](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4013059/chapters/9016873#55849408)," said Erwin, "I would never do anything you didn't want me to. But that's about as faras this arrangement can extend. We fuck every few days, so I don't mind buying you things."

He felt hot. "Like a sugar daddy?" he ventured, though his voice squeaked.

Erwin cracked up. Makoto couldn't help the grimace that crossed his face while the other puffeddesperate laughs into his neck, choking with it. "If you want to[ call](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4013059/chapters/9016873#14934398) it that," he[ managed](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4013059/chapters/9016873#25437045) finally,and Makoto couldn't help but think that this was the first time he'd ever heard the other laugh somuch.

"...Do I have to call you 'daddy' in bed?"

"Please don't."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to my commissioner, who wishes to stay anonymous! The first two chapter of this fic were written as one commissioned piece a while back and now, a whole year later, I've been commissioned to finish the whole thing. :) You're a pleasure to work with!
> 
> For anyone interested, my commission info is here: http://cloverguts.tumblr.com/post/129385688821/andys-emergency-commissions-please-take-2


	2. Chapter 2

The arrangement worked in a weird sort of way.

Nagisa's jokes stopped after a while in favour of speculative comments, bewildered, off-the-cuffremarks like, "Is Makoto really going to see him again? I thought you went last night?" and, "I neverpinned you as a pervert. Those bruises on your hips are really dark!"

The comments embarrassed him, but it wasn't nothing he couldn't handle. After all, it was justNagisa's nature, and he meant no harm. Most likely he was just amazed-- possibly jealous, in theonly way he could be when he was that in love with Rei-- that Makoto, who had always struck himas the mother of their group, was actually getting laid. And the sex was dirty. Well, dirty inNagisa's eyes at least; though Makoto didn't doubt that the blonde had done worse. Moreso hethought it was the fact that he was essentially[GETTING PAID](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4013059/chapters/9017005#18207432) that irked his friends, that brokethe image he'd apparently had for himself as the innocent member of their friendship group. EvenHaru seemed shaken by how open he was about it.

Good, he thought, but immediately felt guilty for the bitterness in his own thoughts. He'd neverliked being thought of as innocent, anyway.

He saw Erwin every other day and received the gifts about once a week. Some of the gifts camewith receipts, and as guilty as it made him feel, Makoto returned them. He needed the[MONEY](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4013059/chapters/9017005#630916) for rent, and what he didn't need he saved; he already had his eyes on a nicer place, way closer tocampus. Nagisa, of course, was one step away from being his personal cheerleader in this regard.

Erwin's fantasies often got pretty intense, but they never skewed the line of Makoto's boundaries.He respected the other man for that-- for respecting Makoto. And he really didn't think of him likean object. (Unless, he reasoned, it made for good dirty talk.)

So it made sense a little into their relationship to invite him out for drinks with his friends. It wasto celebrate the end of midterms, and Erwin had already invited him over when they all decided togo out and celebrate. It would have been rude to cancel on either, and drinks wasn't exactlyoverstepping their boundaries, right?

He didn't actually expect Erwin to accept.

Nagisa couldn't keep his eyes off of the blonde when he arrived, donning pants that probably costmore than Makoto's whole wardrobe. He almost felt bad for Rei, the innocent bystander having tosave a tipsy Nagisa from embarrassing himself with a comment like, hey, you and my friend fuck,right? Who tops?

"Makoto," he greeted, and the shorted immediately felt underdressed. He'd been pretty pleasedwith his outfit, leaving his apartment feeling confident in one of the nicer blazers Erwin hadbought him. But Erwin cleaned up without even having to try, and next to him, he felt he might aswell have been naked.

He led him over to the table where the rest of their friends were waiting, trying to stamp down onhis embarrassment. "This is Erwin," he offered in explanation, but Erwin was already going out ofhis way to introduce himself to everyone at the table.

He sank into his seat, grateful for the distraction from his sex life being out in the open when Rinstarted to brag about his latest times. That engaged Haru, too, who wanted to know if he was anyfaster, and Makoto could deign himself to drinking.

He became more comfortable as the night went on, wondering what had possessed him to evenbegin to think this would be weird. How could it have been weird? he wondered. Erwin fit in withhis friends so naturally, like he'd always belonged there. A few drinks in and he was comfortablyleaning into Haru, chattering on happily about their exams. And what had he thought, that Erwinmight be jealous? That someone might make it weird? It was so far from weird, the comfortableatmosphere at the table yet to evaporate hours later. He was comfortable, a warm feeling low inhis gut, buzzing with the alcohol. He didn't even notice the look in Erwin's eyes before he leant inand whispered, "Bathroom. Meet me there in five minutes."

Makoto did. Swaying on his feet, he excused himself five minutes later, though he was sure itfooled no one as to why he was leaving. He found Erwin waiting in front of an open stall in theempty bathroom, and before he could get a word out, he was being shoved backwards.

Erwin threw him against the stall door as soon as it was locked. Makoto opened his mouth, butwas cut off by Erwin's tongue before he could even get a word out. Erwin didn't beat around thebush, all gestures of foreplay thrown out the window for the better sake of this torturously deepkiss. Erwin's tongue moved against his like he was trying to drink Makoto in, and before he couldeven work out what was happening Makoto was off the ground, squeaking as he wrapped his legsaround Erwin's waist.

"H-how do you even manage that," he muttered, wet breath mingling with Erwin's in the confinedspace between them when he broke their lip lock. "Really, I'm heavy--"

Erwin cut him off again with another kiss, driving his hips into Makoto's. Any protest he mighthave had died away, a full-body shiver taking its place. He arched into Erwin, threading his armsaround the other man's shoulders as he kissed back and allowed himself to be grinded into.Minutes later, Erwin pulled away, eyes dark but detached in the dim light of the bathroom.

"I want to put it in," he breathed harshly, nosing Makoto's neck. "Can I?"

"H-huh? Here? We don't even have a--"

"In my pocket," Erwin interrupted, nipping at Makoto's neck. "No need to stretch you. You'replugged, right?"

Makoto's face went red. Of course he was; Erwin had asked him to be. He'd been squirming a littleall night, but it was easy to get used to the feeling. Mainly, he just thought it would mean that heand Erwin were going to have sex when they got home, and when had he started referring toeither of their places as 'home'?

"Please," Erwin said, nuzzling Makoto's neck again. He wasn't drunk, neither of them were, but thetipsy atmosphere between them was making all of Erwin's movements feel sleepier, hotter.

"What if we get caught?"

"We won't," Erwin said, his only answer. Makoto groaned.

"You can't possibly know that. Someone walks in, and then what?"

"Then," said Erwin, pulling away so that his gaze burned into Makoto's, "I cover your mouth."

He couldn't help the drop of feeling through his stomach. He swallowed. "You were jealous," hesaid, realising.

Erwin didn't answer. It was plain on his face, a dark glower.

"Why?" Makoto ventured, and better yet, how-- wasn't that overstepping the boundaries they'destablished? Feelings weren't meant to come into it.

"You were... really close. To that Haruka guy."

Makoto's eyes blew wide open. "Haru and I are just--"

"It doesn't matter."

"He doesn't feel that way, so there's nothing to worry about--"

"Makoto." He shut up, jaw tight. "I want to. Please. Can I?" He rolled his hips into Makoto's again,and all self restraint left him. He shut his eyes and rolled his head back to rest on the door.

"Yeah."

Erwin turned him so that he was standing against the door, able to brace himself with his hands.Using his strength Erwin removed the plug and lifted Makoto by the hip, entering him easily andleaning over the man's back. Makoto shivered.

No matter how many times they did it, he thought, he might never get used to the feeling of Erwinbeing inside of him. Something about the stretch was so wholly satisfying, the deep-body feelingof being full. When Erwin was all the way in he always held still for a moment, mouthing atMakoto's neck while he waited for him to adjust.

"Can I...?" he began, and when Makoto nodded, he would start.

It was hard keeping his voice in. Erwin was angry, the feeling rolling off of him in waves as hepounded into Makoto. He waited no time teasing him, slamming right into the spot Makotoneeded it and jerking him roughly. He jammed two fingers into Makoto's mouth when the otherbegan having trouble controlling his volume, urging him to suck on them. Drool slid past Makoto'slips as he tried to wrap his tongue around the digits, face reddening at the lewdness of thefeeling.

Music drifted into the tiny bathroom as the door was opened from the outside. Erwin immediatelywent still, the hand that had previously been playing at Makoto's tongue slapping over his mouthto keep him quiet. Makoto couldn't help the tiniest of moans, though thankfully it was stifled, hiscock twitching in Erwin's hand.

Whoever it was took their time. They were whistling all the while, spending far too long washingtheir hands after-- probably fixing their hair. Erwin, impatient, thrusted into Makoto with lazyrolls of his hips, too positioned to make a noise but brushing right against Makoto's prostate. Hecould feel his hips stuttering into Erwin's too-tight grip on him, his throat contracting with theeffort of not crying out.

As soon as the person was gone, Makoto whimpered into Erwin's palm. The hand that hadcontained his noises was now encouraging them, drawing them out as a rough thumb dug into hishipbone, digging harsh circles as he worked his hand over Makoto's length.

Makoto barely managed an, "Erwin, I'm--" before he was spilling into Erwin's hand, bones goingweak as he rested his full weight against the door.

Erwin wasn't far behind. Placing both hands on Makoto's hips, he thrusted into the other withreckless abandon, going still when he came, groaning harshly against Makoto's neck.

The discomfort flooded him as soon as Erwin pulled out. He'd been a little too rough, and Makotowas already wincing at the thought of having to sit down at the table with everyone again.

"What was that?" he accused, though his voice lacked the malice it needed to be even slightlyintimidating towards Erwin. The blonde raised an eyebrow.

"What was what?"

"You, getting jealous. I thought the whole point of this was that we didn't... you know."

"It wasn't a big deal," Erwin answered; the shrug of his shoulders was so infuriating Makoto couldhave cried. "I was turned on, and I didn't like the way he was looking at you. That was all."

Makoto's face was red. It made sense-- it was fair enough. And yet, he'd gone and thought it wassomething more.

"Hey," Erwin said, and before Makoto could react he was drawn into the circle of Erwin's arms. "I'msorry if it upset you. If it crossed some boundary. I won't--"

"It was fine," Makoto answered, and offering him a sleepy smile. "Sorry. I overreacted."

Erwin smiled back at him, their usual disposition returning, when a thought seemed to occur.

He jerked his head back in the direction of the plug.

"What are you gonna do with that?"

Makoto just groaned.


	3. Chapter 3

Makoto couldn't remember when the word 'boundaries' had started needing a dictionary definition.

"That's not weird," he said, fixedly moving around his co-worker to look busy, just in case their boss decided to walk in and check up on them. "Is it?"

"You tell me, man," Rin snarked back. He was training to be an Olympic swimmer; on his days off from what was apparently a hectic training schedule, or bothering Nagisa to go clubbing with him or whatever other ridiculous activity it was that only those two were willing to engage in, he worked alongside Makoto in the Gummy Sharks cafe, a little kiosk-sized thing in the middle of an always-busy public swimming pool. It was an okay chance for Makoto to get to be around water while he was busy finishing his last year of college. Sometimes, after his shift, his boss would come down and find him and give him fifteen minutes or so to run a lesson with the kids, either a new swimming class or some volunteers down from Iwatobi who were running a workshop. It was his fourth job, anyway, and so far the best. He was about 90% sure that Rin was just in it for the money. Not that he was judging. Rin had gotten him the job in the first place.

"It's just lunch," he affirmed, more to himself than to his friend. "Yeah. That's not weird at all."

"I don't know," Rin said, heaving a bag of coffee beans onto the counter. "Let's look at this-- shit-- logically, or whatever. If _you_ were someone's sugar daddy, would _you_ want to be invited out for tickles and tea in daylight hours?"

Makoto felt the blush spread over his cheeks. "He's not my sugar daddy."

"You've stopped calling him that now? Whatever, as if I can keep up. Hey, muscles, are you gonna help over here or are those biceps mainly for show?"

Makoto scrambled over to help Rin with the heavy lifting. "Sorry," he mumbled, still thinking about lunch and Erwin and school and stress. "I've been really out of it lately."

"I'll say, dick-for-brains." Rin paused, shaking his head and looking apologetic. "Sorry, I shouldn't talk to you like I talk to Haru."

Makoto's face twisted in distaste. "You shouldn't talk to Haru like that either, maybe--"

"Whatever. Regardless; stress is clearly eating you alive. Do you need me to cover any of your shifts this week?"

"No," Makoto resigned, going back to cleaning counters, "I need the money. Rent, and all. Groceries. Keeping Haru alive."

"And you can't ask Daddy Big Bucks to lend you some?"

Makoto feels faint at the idea. Lately the boundaries of his and Erwin's relationship have seemed more skewed than usual. It's not as if any of his _feelings_ have changed, per se, but-- well. They've certainly been seeing a lot more of each other.

It had started with going out for drinks-- not weird, right? As long as the night ended in sex, Makoto didn't think that anything weird had to come out of it. But then they had run into each other that one time at the grocery store, and had ended up spending the afternoon together before Erwin had gotten called into work and left and-- he was thinking way too much into this.

Rin stepped into his personal space.

"Ouch!"

"Is this a grey hair?" Rin squinted at the follicle in his hand he'd just violently plucked from Makoto's innocent scalp. He shook his head morosely. "I'm telling you, man, you need a break."

"I'm fine," Makoto said patiently, pretending like he was really interested in cleaning. "Honestly."

Rin wasn't convinced. Makoto wasn't even sure whether he'd convinced himself.

.

Getting off work on a Friday wasn't exactly the well-hailed haven it was cracked up to be by 9-to-5 workers everywhere else like Erwin, in Makoto's opinion, or at least not when there was a stack of homework the size of planet Earth and a roommate who could barely look after himself waiting on the other side of his apartment door.

Makoto circled the block a few times in his beat-up car (courtesy of one too many returned gifts from Erwin, though he was ashamed to admit it; he just couldn't stand catching the train everywhere anymore, even in Tokyo.) After about ten minutes of driving around aimlessly in this manner, Makoto decided that the pent up stress vibrating his muscles wasn't going away any time soon, that he'd better do _something_ to quell his nerves if he was planning on pulling an all-nighter to catch up with his studies like he was planning.

Somehow, on his way down the main road he ended up missing the turn-off for McDonalds, and a furthermore somehow from that he ended up bypassing the strip of fast food restaurants altogether and turning into Erwin's street. He'd ignored the 'come over later' text all day, debating whether he should or whether he should just stay in with his textbooks like he'd planned, but one look at his... acquaintance, standing in the doorway all tall and blond and appropriately dishevelled from a hard day's work in an office, and Makoto was sold against any other idea he might have had. Erwin led him inside with a firm hand on his lower back.

Ten minutes later and they were both seated comfortably on one of Erwin's nicer sofas with a bottle of red between them, the stress gradually leaving Makoto in soft rivets.

"So," Erwin said, leaning across to pour Makoto another drink. His bicep brushed Makoto's shoulder as he did, the softness and firmness of it familiar now but not yet lacking that little spark of excitement it sent through Makoto. "You're working at that leisure centre now, aren't you?"

"The swimming pool, yeah." Makoto hid his proud little smile behind his glass. Because okay, sure, he loved any chance he got to work with children, long hours and shitty pay be damned. "I get to, um... train as an assistant coach before and after shifts sometimes."

"So it's more hands-on?" Erwin questioned, watching him carefully over the rim of his own wine glass. "Than your last job?"

Makoto's brain reeled. His last job had been at an office firm not unlike the one at which he met Erwin, filing paperwork, and before that--

"I guess I do miss seeing you at work," Makoto sighed, pulling another little tongue-in-cheek smile. " _That_ was hands-on."

Erwin let out a singular laugh under his breath. It was the kind of strong and stoic noise he often gave, with just enough joy backing it to let a pleasant little cloud of pride swell through Makoto's chest. Something about making Erwin laugh felt like a real achievement.

"And the hours? Are they alright, do you have enough time to study?"

Makoto considered lying, for some reason, perhaps to keep Erwin from becoming concerned. He gave in with a sigh. "The hours are hard," he admitted, voice muffled by the glass. "That with trying to balance time for classes and time to study... Rin's convinced he saw a _grey hair_ today."

"I can assure you you're not going grey," Erwin said, and though his tone was serious, amusement tugged the corner of his mouth up. That crooked smile. Makoto felt a tiny bit more of the stress and tension leave his body.

"So you're stressed," Erwin says, leaning back in his seat with his hands behind his head. Makoto tried and failed not to stare at the way that movement drew his shirt up, the way the muscles in his arms strained against the taut fabric, and grinned sheepishly when he was caught.

"I guess, um." He scratched the back of his head. "I guess you could say I'm stressed. I'm dealing though. Yeah, I'll be fine--"

"I know you'll _be_ fine, but that doesn't mean you're fine now," Erwin said measuredly, and that got Makoto's attention. He blinked at the taller man. Erwin smiled. "Clearly, you came to see me for a reason."

Makoto felt his cheeks heat up. "Because you invited me--"

"So," Erwin said, stretching his arms again. There was a glint of something in his eye. "How about you just let me fuck the stress out of you?"

Makoto tensed, then relaxed all at once. He had to make it sound so _embarrassing,_ didn't he, but--

But.

The idea did send a little shiver of thrill through him.

"That's..." he swallowed. "Not a bad idea."

"Uh-huh," Erwin said, still watching Makoto.

Neither of them moved. It had never been like this before, never felt like a game, like hiding things from each other, but--

"How about we take this to the bedroom," Erwin said, still careful, "and I'll make sure to take _real, good care of you._ "

Makoto's stomach dropped. He didn't waste another second getting to the bedroom.

Moments later he heard Erwin come in, now sans tie  and loosening the buttons of his shirt. "Lie down," he said, not bothering to pretend he wasn't staring at Makoto's lithe form, now struggling out of his pants.

Makoto started to turn.

"On your stomach."

Freezing for a moment, he rolled onto his stomach.

There were some moments of silence in the room, where he wasn't sure whether or not Erwin was watching him or doing something or _leaving_ or what, before--

"Ah," he said, surprised at the sudden feeling of his boxers being brought down. In the chill of the room, Erwin's warm hands found his hips, guiding them up and off the bed. Makoto could feel the callouses on them, rough against his sensitive flesh, and could feel the other man, still saying nothing behind him.

He began to grow uncomfortable, blood rushing to his face at a distressing rate. "Erwin, I don't know what--"

He was cut off a choked moan when he felt the first warm, wet, tentative press of the other man's tongue to his cleft.

"Sh-shit," he stammered, feeling his breath begin to catch in his chest already.

"Hm," Erwin hummed against his hole, and the vibrations, _Jesus--_ "I'd prefer it if you didn't say that word while I was down here."

"Don't be-- _aaah God_." Makoto couldn't bring himself to say anything in response to what was obviously a smug and amused grin stretched against him, because Erwin was working a finger into him now, that hot tongue still licking at him, spreading him open.

"Good?" Erwin asked, not pulling away far enough that his lips didn't vibrate against Makoto when he spoke. When Makoto didn't say anything, he crooked his finger.

"Ah!"

He felt that grin again. Makoto shivered.

Gradually he felt himself being worked open, the tantalisingly slow pace working the stress out of him in buzzing, hot sensations, nerves being stimulated as if being woken gently. He was shuddering nonstop into the bed sheets, moans strung out of him like it was effortless, and all the while Erwin's tongue was working, his fingers stretching, just enough pressure and sensation to push Makoto to the edge without letting him fall over it.

"P-please," he began to stutter after a while.

"Hm?" Erwin hummed again. The sensation caused Makoto to shut his eyes around another shiver.

"Please," he said again, trying to crane his neck around to say. His fingers had just about pulled the sheets to threads under them, pulled tight into fists so locked that his knuckles were white. When Erwin just looked at him, smiling, Makoto tried to shift his hips again, but it was useless. Erwin had one hand firmly placed on his hip, and just the sheer strength of that was enough to lock him into place. It was _embarrassing_ how quickly that fact always managed to turn him on. Makoto was a big guy, he'd always been the strong one in his friendship group, and Erwin treated him like he weighed nothing. It was exhilarating.

"Alright," Erwin said, calmly moving back and leaving Makoto feeling empty and cold. "Sit up."

Dazedly, Makoto did. The amount of precum pooling around his tip should have been embarrassing, but, well. As it was, he was almost too far gone to feel shame, and eagerly scrambled towards Erwin when he was beckoned.

Only to be shoved back flat on his back, one hand firmly resting against his throat.

Makoto gasped. Erwin wasn't leaning any of his weight against the other man yet, so the feeling of his fingers was just the light ghosting of digits against flesh. Still, Makoto could feel the shudders of excitement starting up again, could feel his cock giving a twitch of interest.

"Makoto," Erwin spoke, still in that measured tone that strained just enough to suggest the level of control he was having to utilise. "I want to try something."

Still feeling the fingers around his throat, Makoto understood. The thought of it was thrilling, Makoto's whole body trembling at the thought of it, at the thought of what was to come if he said yes. Swallowing, he nodded.

Erwin removed his hand from Makoto's throat and got to work propping his knees up enough to slide between them. Efficient, bordering on desperate and _hungry_ now, Erwin finished spreading Makoto open-- who was already pretty stretched and relaxed from before-- and put the condom on with rushed ease, sliding into the other man without warning.

Makoto felt the breath leave his lungs and opened his mouth around a moan. Seconds later, with no warning, he felt Erwin's fingers slide around his throat again. This time, flexing like they had been waiting to do this forever, they squeezed.

Erwin started to fuck in earnest with only one goal in mind.

Makoto felt the air rattle in his throat, which was fluttering around the constriction, desperately trying to get air. Only mere moments into the sensation he was seeing spots around his vision and could feel his head becoming comfortably numb, the only sensation being Erwin below him thrusting in and out with a new found vigour, hitting his prostate dead-on every time.

Erwin relaxed his fingers around Makoto's throat. Makoto gasped around the air that was suddenly flooding in, blinking at the light around him. Then, Erwin's hand was back.

"That's it," Erwin grunted, straining with the force of what he was doing. "Taking it like the good slut you are, Tachibana."

Makoto felt a whine catch in his throat, barely coming out against the pressure there. "E-Erwin--"

"That's it, take it," Erwin growled. "Take it for me. So good, Makoto, so tight-- you like being fucked, don't you? Like being stretched open for me, shown what a good slut you are-- you like it when I make you beg--" Makoto could barely breathe. And he was still fucking into him, fucking into Makoto, pushing him towards the edge now, forcing him there--

Makoto's orgasm caught him off guard, a reedy gasp escaping his mouth as he spilled between their bodies. Moments later Erwin was following, his hands moving from Makoto's throat to grip his hips bruisingly tight as Makoto dizzily struggled to catch his breath again. When he came back to reality minutes later, Erwin was easing out of him, gently moving Makoto's frame so that he could drape the duvet over it.

"Makoto," he said, watching the other carefully. Makoto felt like purring at the name, stretching his limbs to test them. He was a little sore, but mostly it was just bliss he was feeling, utter bliss and relaxation coursing through his body.

"Makoto," Erwin said again, a little concerned now.

Makoto realised his eyes had been closed. "Mmm?" he drawled, blinking at the light and Erwin's peering face.

"...I'll get you water," he said after a moment, shaking his head. Makoto could swear there was some amusement there.

Moments later the taller returned with a glass of water and chocolate, which Makoto couldn't even remember telling him he liked. He reached for the water gratefully, realising as he drank it that he probably had a dopey smile on his face. Erwin was smiling at him like he was an idiot.

"Less stressed now?" he asked, climbing onto the bedspace beside Makoto.

"Mhm," Makoto hummed, the sound drawn out and relaxed, a satisfied sound. Erwin chuckled.

The sound somewhat reminded Makoto of where he was and his situation, and he sat up a little more against the headboard. "I'll get going in a minute," he promised, stretching his arms again. "Just let me recover for a second and I'll get out of your hair--"

"Don't be ridiculous," Erwin said, sliding up the headboard so he was pressed against Makoto's side. Reaching for a remote on the bedside table, he switched the master bedroom's television on. A game show started to blare dully in the background. "You can stay for a while. How about we watch a movie?"

Makoto wasn't about to argue. He reached for the chocolate.


	4. Chapter 4

Being the CEO of a major international company meant a few things for Erwin Smith.

Firstly, he worked long hours, both from home and in the office. A lot of his time was spent thinking of business, and working with business, on business calls and flying to and from business meetings. Sometimes it suited him to consider the fact that he also needed to worry about his _own_ business to keep sane, but that was a whole other category of hard work.

Secondly, being a CEO meant that he reaped the financial benefits of a CEO. Since his time in the army as a young man, and subsequently leaving military position to be closer to family, Erwin had dedicated more than the last 10 years of his life to working up to his position, partially balanced on the back of his father and his grandfather, and in return, he would go as far to say that he was well off monetarily. Being well off monetarily, as well, led to the third thing.

Being a CEO had led him to meet Makoto Tachibana.

Erwin hadn't minded buying him gifts at the start. In fact, he'd kind of loved it. He had the money to spare, and going out, spending it on lavish gifts so that he could see the face of his sex friend light up, so that he could see that genuine and cheesy joy, that flutter of those lashes, those red lips part as Makoto said, with utter authenticity, "Thank you, Erwin."

The gifts never stopped, though Erwin started including receipts with some of them when he noticed that Makoto was always a little behind on rent and struggling to get from one job to the next. He could have just given him the money, of course, but he knew for a fact that Makoto would have been too polite to accept it. Besides: giving money to someone you were sleeping with felt... well, dirty.

They'd worked out their boundaries. Of course they had. They'd talked about it, too, and in Erwin's own words, he had told Makoto's beaming face that he wasn't interested in a relationship. Which was fine in Makoto's books, because according to him, he liked someone else, anyway.

Or he had liked someone else. That was almost six months ago now. Who knew what had changed?

Erwin certainly knew what had changed for him.

He also knew that the person Makoto had referred to had been Haruka, his insufferable roommate who had hardly spoken when they all went out for drinks together those months ago, but who Makoto was always careful about, always delicate with. They seemed more suited to be parent and child than lovers, in Erwin's opinion. So maybe something had changed there, too.

Erwin was developing feelings.

It was impossible— and improbable, and immature, and all the other 'i' words he could think of— to describe how idiotic he was being about what was meant to be a mature, adult arrangement. They had worked out _boundaries,_ for Christ's sake, and here he was defiling them all because of what was most definitely a stupid and fleeting crush, because-- because what? Because he was lonely?

Erwin downed the rest of his drink and rose to his feet.

"Aw," his coworker said, lolling a drunken hand in Erwin's direction. "Leaving so soon, Smith? Come on, celebrate."

"You know how it is," he said in reply, smoothly, punctuating it with a practised grin. "Some of us have to be into work early tomorrow."

"Uh-huh. And _some of us_ have _lives._ Learn to loosen up a little. Work isn't your life, y'know."

Erwin bowed politely, and left the work group he'd been drinking with, but not too fast to catch the same coworker leaning over the table to mutter, _"_ Foreigners, man, I'm telling you..."

He'd been throwing himself into his work so much lately that it was making his head spin. Erwin had no idea how to handle feelings when he caught them. Mostly he just stared at and scrutinized the things until they went away, withered and scared under his stoic stare, but with Makoto it was--

Different. If that was the right word to describe such a strange arrangement.

His phone started to buzz in his pocket, altering him to the existence of the aforementioned. He'd been avoiding most of his calls the past week or so in favour of claiming that work was keeping him busy. He knew it was immature, that it would have been better suited for him just to address his feelings like an adult and debunk them, but some inkling of fear had kept him from doing so. He needed something, some distraction, some peace offering, or--

Erwin stopped in the light of a clothing store on his way to his apartment block. He had an idea. Shaking off the cold from outside, Erwin entered the store. He was going to buy Makoto a gift.

.

After not hearing from his sex friend for more than a week and a half, Makoto was surprised to get the text message as he was leaving class on a Thursday night.

'Come over tonight' it said, plain and simple, just that, with no follow-ups or context as to why Erwin hadn't responded to any of his messages. It wasn't like they were in a relationship, so Makoto didn't mind that they didn't talk frequently. He also didn't mind if they didn't see each other every week, though he was deigning to admit that he did get to missing the guy after a while.  Mood considerably uplifted now, however, Makoto started in the direction of his car with a skip in his step.

Erwin was waiting for him on the sofa in the living room with a gift bag by his side. Makoto was caught off guard, so he simply pointed, blinking at the fancy English script along the side.

"Is that for me?"

"Yes," Erwin replied without missing a beat. The man rose to his feet with the bag, bringing it over to Makoto. "It's a gift. If you're willing, I would like you to take it into the other room and put it on, Makoto."

Makoto blinked with surprise. Taking the bag from Erwin, he rifled through it for a moment, parting the fancy purple tissue paper to find--

"E-Erwin," he stammered, nearly throwing the gift bag back in his surprise. "You don't seriously mean--"

"I bought it for you," Erwin continued, seeming to size up both Makoto and their situation. "It's your size, and the colour will suit your skin tone very nicely. If you don't like it, I can easily return it. However..." Makoto didn't miss the way the other's eyes raked up his whole body, eliciting a little shiver at the attention. Erwin's eyes met his. "I would really enjoy seeing you in it. In fact, I've been thinking about it all day."

Makoto swallowed. Slowly, he headed into the next room.

Once he was alone with the bag, he pulled out the lingerie to get a proper look at it.

It was burgundy in colour, with sheer black and lace accents framing what looked to be a tiny number. It was obviously tailored, which made him blush a little at the thought that Erwin had gone to this amount of effort just to get him lingerie. The straps of the-- of the brassier, he guessed, jaw tightening at the thought of it, were firm material and lace, and would fit over his shoulders nicely, though he hated to admit it. Then there were the bottoms, lace panties, sheer at the back, which didn't look like they'd cover anything, nor did the-- strap-thingies, he guessed, look like they'd ever support his size or hold anything up.

Still. Makoto took a deep breath in. He could say no. He could say no, but he didn't want to. He wanted to impress Erwin. To do this for Erwin, if it was something he liked. Psyching himself up, Makoto began to step into the lingerie.

When he emerged from the bedroom, Erwin was waiting on the sofa again. He had his feet up on the coffee table, his arms slung back and supporting the back of his head. He didn't look particularly rushed or bothered, so Makoto slowly inched his way forward, already wrapping his arms around his midsection in self-consciousness.

He wasn't prepared for the way Erwin's eyes would study his frame, like he was taking in every last inch, studying him, up and down, then meeting his own gaze like a speeding car coming to a stop. He wasn't prepared to find the hunger in them, either.

"It looks silly," he said, chuckling self-consciously as he alternated between wanting to cover himself and wanting to just retreat back into the bedroom. "It looks dumb, I'll just--"

"Makoto," Erwin said, shutting him up.

The blonde's eyes were almost swallowed entirely by the black of his pupils. When he motioned Makoto over to the sofa, it was so that he could gesture for Makoto to get down. To drop to his knees. Still not breaking eye contact, Makoto complied.

"I'm going to ask you something," Erwin said carefully, still looking hungry, still looking out of control with himself, "and you have every right to say no, every right to refuse. But I will let you know that this is only for my personal enjoyment, and that no one else will every lay eyes, letalone hands on it, that I will keep it in a very safe and secure place only for my personal enjoyment." Makoto swallowed when Erwin's eyelids dropped a little, gazing down at him where he kneeled on the floor. Something about their position, their eye contact, and the fact that they weren't even touching at all, was more intimate than anything Makoto could have fathomed.

"I want to record you sucking me off."

Makoto felt his breath catch in his throat. He could see, now, how Erwin's phone was waiting just out of reach on his lap, a silent black thing, entirely his choice. Erwin had said he could say no. Just like the lingerie, he could turn this down, refuse.

But he wanted to hear him say the words again.

"Say it again," he said, the words coming out barely above a whisper. Erwin's eyes darkened, and Makoto's tongue darted out to lip his lips. "What you want to do."

"Makoto," Erwin said carefully, not taking his eyes off of him. "I want to record you, with my phone, while you suck me off."

The shiver that hit him went all the way down to his stomach, dropping low and hot and dark in the pit of it and twisting his insides. Makoto broke their eye contact to drop his head down onto Erwin's lap, smelling the musk of him, feeling the firmness of his thighs. Still not looking up, he nodded.

Erwin fisted a hand in the back of his hair and forced his head back up. Before Makoto had the chance to get any words through his parted open in shock mouth Erwin's tongue was in it, catching him in surprise in a hot, wet mess of a kiss, more teeth and tongue than lips. When he pulled away his eyes were fiercely dark and wanting, staring at Makoto like he was the only person in the world.

He was on his knees, and he had never felt so powerful.

Erwin took his phone from his lap and started to play with the camera settings. In the meantime, Makoto worked open the buttons on his pants, tugging the zipper down at what he assumed was a torturous pace. He tried to keep eye contact with Erwin while he did it, which was hard while the other was distracted, so he busied himself with pulling the other man from the confines of his boxers, and held him, half-hard, in his hand while he waited. Erwin pointed the camera phone at Makoto and met his eye.

"You can start," he said.

Makoto got to work, teasing as he went and calling on every single memory he had of sucking dick. He knew by now what Erwin liked best, which ways were easiest to make him lose control, but even as it was it seemed that Erwin was focussing too hard on not losing control while he held the camera up, intent on filming the whole thing. Makoto's eyelids fluttered shut at the thought that he'd have to work harder than ever to get a reaction from the man above you.

His eyes were forced open again as soon as Erwin cleared his throat, forcing him to meet the man's eyes. "Look at me," he said, voice rumbling and dark. "Don't close your eyes. Don't look anywhere else. Keep looking at me."

Makoto bowed his head in compliance.

Makoto fisted one of his hands around the base of Erwin's cock as he worked, tongue moving in firm circles against the head, cheeks hollowing as he sucked. Gradually he could see control slipping in the other man, could see his cheeks pinkening and his breath coming faster, moving his chest in gently heaves. Teasing, Makoto would pull off just to lick gently, looking up through his lashes as he did so, always to find Erwin watching, looking down at him like he was the most powerful thing in the universe.

He could feel it when he was getting close, could feel the shuddering just beneath the surface of where he was sucking, the tightening of muscles in Erwin's thighs.

"Look at the camera," Erwin grunted, still with that stiff glare, and without missing a beat, Makoto took the head of Erwin's cock into his mouth, and looked directly into the camera.

Erwin came around him.

When Makoto was finally down swallowing the last of it and licking the softening member in his hand clean, he noticed that Erwin had turned the camera off, and was setting the phone down beside himself, spent. Makoto moved back to allow the other to tuck himself back into his pants, watching and waiting patiently, rubbing his stretched and sore jaw and wondering at the rawness of his throat.

After a moment, Erwin ushered him up onto the sofa with him. "Come here."

Makoto did, wasting no time crawling into his lap. He felt brave now, seeing the way Erwin's eyes moved around to his backside, the way his hands slid over the lace.

"Y'know, I don't think I mind this," Makoto said cheekily, gesturing to the straps of his outfit. "The material feels kind of nice on my chest. And other places."

Despite what they'd just done, Makoto felt the other's dick give a twitch of interest below him. He grinned.

"Now," Erwin said, stealing the power of their situation back in one breath. "You did such a good job for me. How about I reciprocate?"


	5. Chapter 5

Erwin hadn't spoken to him in two weeks.

It had been two weeks since Makoto had gotten on his knees in lingerie for the man, and three and a half weeks since they'd seen each other before that. Makoto wouldn't have minded, per se, if Erwin had at least responded to his 'are you okay?' text, sent four days after his 'do you want to get lunch?' text.

He knew asking for lunch was probably overstepping their boundaries. Rin had about told him as much when he'd asked about it, and Rin was pretty well versed in the knowledge of these things.

It was just--

He felt so stupid. He'd been so sure that their relationship had progressed to something almost like a friendship, that after last time-- and after what had happened _after_ last time, their gentle, easy hanging out, their banter, lunch wasn't too out of the ordinary.

Sure, he knew Erwin was busy. Being the CEO of a major company was _hard,_ and Makoto knew just from memory how hard it was to keep up with all the stresses just of office work as part time job, letalone as something one did for a living. Despite that, he knew the man would have found time in his day to shoot a text back, to at least let a concerned Makoto-- whose concern was warranted, thank you very much-- know that he was still alive.

Had he done something? He was convinced that that was the case, since his obviously socialite personality was always getting him into these misunderstandings. It had gotten him into the misunderstanding with Haru, too, when he had developed feelings for his friend around the time they were 17 and, since he had been unsure how to deal with it, had irrevocably turned into the bumbling jackass Nagisa still makes fun of him for being today.

He had liked Haru then because he was soft and easy to figure out. His best friend, Makoto figured he didn't need to spend any time learning how to take care of him, how to live with him and spend his time around just the one person. That, paired with their closeness, had been an easy recipe for Makoto's waxing crush, and one that had in fact lasted years to come. It was only now that Makoto was beginning to pull himself from the depths of those feelings, to address them and deal with them like a rational human being. His arrangement with Erwin had helped a lot; he felt more in control of his body, at least, less stressed and confused about things, more like an adult who could enter into adult relationships and handle adult feelings and know the difference between those and childhood crushes before--

Well, before.

It was almost like Erwin had disappeared off the face of the Earth.

He had no idea how he felt about Erwin, either.

This was the worst part. The fact that they had sorted out _boundaries,_ for God's sake, and now here Makoto was, breaking them down with his fists because he couldn't sort out his stupid feelings.

Did he have feelings?

He didn't know. He didn't know what feelings were supposed to feel like, in fact, or how healthy adults entered into relationships in the first place. He'd been hung up on Haru so long.

It was a Saturday, and he wasn't working. His shift had been given away to someone on account of the fact that he was supposed to be studying, which he was, until about 11 this morning when he realised that he knew all the content and needed to relax before this impending exam sent him crazy. He couldn't confide in Nagisa about this, since all of Nagisa's advice chalked down either to "kill him" or "sleep with him." He couldn't confide in Rei because Rei was too logical about these kinds of things and anyway, Rei would tell Nagisa, which just reinforced his first point. 

He couldn't go to Haru for obvious reasons, number one being that he was _Haru._ Besides. That was a bridge he didn’t want to cross yet.

The only person left to call was Rin, then. Makoto braved it. He needed advice.

"What?" Rin answered on the third ring like he didn't know who it was, even though Makoto knew he had caller ID. He was in Rin's phone as 'mom'.

"Rin, are you busy tonight?" he asked, failing to keep the hope out of his voice.

Rin snorted. "What, because I'm such a loser that I obviously don't have plans on a Saturday night? How rude. Maybe I have a date tonight."

"Oh," Makoto said. "Well, if that's the case, then--"

"I don't have plans," Rin said, sounding pissed. "So I _guess_ I can give you the time of day. What do you want?"

"I was wondering if you, um... wanted to get drinks tonight?"

"...Is this a date?"

" _No._ No, I'm just--"

"Because if it is, I have to tell you, you're great, but--"

"Rin, knock it off. Do you want to come out with me or not?"

Rin sighed. "Name the time and place."

He let Rin pick, in the end, and they ended up at a slightly threatening bar in the East of town, with shots of vodka in front of them.

"Can't we just get the colourful ones from the menu?" Makoto asked, ducking his head shyly so he could talk to Rin in a small voice. He wasn't sure what kind of place Rin was going to take them to, and it hadn't even occurred to him how long it had been since he'd been in a bar just for the sake of drinking, without a group of friends to protect him.

"Okay, listen. I know you are one, but there's no need to order drinks like a faggot, yeah?"

"Rin," he chastised, feeling his face burn and his brow furrow. Rin waved a hand.

"I can say the word, I'm doing Sosuke. Oh, shit, that reminds me. How's your sugar daddy going?"

Makoto waited a beat too late to answer, and Rin slid the shot glass towards him grimly. "You caught feelings, huh?"

"I didn't _catch--_ it's complicated, okay? I know how that sounds--"

"Like a fourteen year old girl's facebook status--"

"--but it's true, so that's that. We're not dating, so it isn't like we need to see each other every day, right? It doesn't matter how I... feel, or don't feel--"

"And you _feel_ gay," Rin said, his eyes boring into Makoto's. "Totally cock-swept. Your balls are giving you the dokis."

"Shut up. Please."

Rin glanced around at Makoto's prompting, grinning when he looked back. "Are you _scared?_ Oh my _God,_ dude, you're like the biggest guy here."

It shouldn't, but it made him think of Erwin, of his big frame and his thick arms and the way he lifted Makoto like he weighed nothing--

"Not in every bar," he insisted, lowering his voice to a whisper. "And anyway, I don't know anyone here. There were motorcycles outside. Why do you even _come_ to this place--"

"You know, ordering a girly drink really wouldn't have helped your case," Rin said. He threw back a shot like he was an expert, which looked cool right up until he started spluttering. "Jesus," he said, hacking into his fist. "Fuck. Nasty stuff."

"Karma," Makoto corrected, and threw back a shot of his own.

He didn't mean to, but he got drunk quickly, slurring more and more information at Rin as the night went on. Before he knew it he was admitting to things he hadn't planned to, ranting about Erwin and Haru and work and school.

"I mean, it's not even like-- like, feelings, y'know? I don't know about those."

"Amen to that, sister." Rin raised his glass. He'd eventually resigned and let Makoto order a fruity cocktail, which he had then ordered three more of, much to the chagrin of their bartender, who just about thought Makoto was the cutest thing ever. Makoto didn't mind the attention, flirting back and forth with him in between bringing drinks back to the table. Rin shook his head as Makoto slid into the booth.

"What?" he said, self-consciously shielding himself with a bright pink drink and the oversized pineapple slice sticking out from it.

"You're a total _minx,_ " Rin said, still shaking his head. "Moving your hips and shit. You gonna ask for his number, or should I?"

"I don't know what you're talking about," Makoto insisted. Then he started laughing. Because something about being drunk was always so funny, damn it.

Meanwhile Rin was still shaking his head. "I don't know why anyone ever thought you were innocent."

"Right? I can be cool. I can be... wild."

"You're drunk, Makoto."

"And you're uptight." He laughed again, then, because seriously, he'd just called _Rin Matsuoka_ uptight. The aforementioned didn't look too pleased at that fact, grimacing at Makoto a moment longer before apparently making his decision.

"Alright, I'm driving you home."

Makoto whined, trying desperately to cling to the table when he was forced away from it.

"Makoto," Rin said, annoyed.

"You ruin my fun," Makoto accused, allowing himself to be led out of the bar. "You're a fun ruiner."

"Uh-huh. I'm the greatest party pooper to ever poop on anybody's party. Get in my car."

Makoto threw the bartender one last coquettish salute as he left the bar, feeling himself flush when the guy waved back, not unhappily. Rin led him into the car and strapped him in. He was making this face the whole time, like he was partway between annoyed and amused and couldn't make up his mind.

"What're you thinking about?" Makoto questioned when he slid into the driver's seat. Rin gave him a sidelong glance for a second and shook his head.

"Just that it's weird, having to be the mom friend for once. I'm deciding it's really not my thing."

"You and Sosuke don't want kids?"

Rin screwed his nose up. "We fuck, we're not married." His voice was quieter when he spoke again. "Besides. Sosuke would be a better parent than me, anyway."

They drove in silence for a while, Makoto watching the city lights blur outside and debating his current situation.

"Drive me to Erwin's."

"No."

"It's just a right up here. Like two blocks away--"

"No, Makoto. You're drunk."

"Hardly. And I can make my own decisions--"

"Right. You're a mess, you know that?" Rin side-eyed him hard. "How about you wake up tomorrow morning, deal with your hangover, and then mull over your feelings like a normal adult human? Drowning your sorrows in hard liquor doesn't suit you."

Makoto shut up at that, the chastising tone sobering him up a little with shame. When they got to his apartment complex, he climbed out. Rin sighed, leaning out the window before he could drive away. "Get some rest, Makoto. Call me when you're sober, yeah?"

"Sure," Makoto said, swaying on his feet a little. Rin rolled his eyes. He drove away.

Makoto stood in the cold for a moment, considering his apartment and what was waiting for him up there. A sleeping Haru, maybe a Haru waiting up late in front of the tv with some playback of a race on. A tiny bedroom with an uncomfortable mattress where he could spend another night jerking off (alone, face turned into the pillow like he was ashamed, or something) and then wake up by himself to another Sunday filled with stress for the impending week.

Makoto got out his cellphone and called himself an uber.

He was at Erwin's house within minutes, marching up to the door and banging his fist against it. It only occurred to him as he did this that it might not be such a good idea after all, that if he hadn't been overstepping boundaries before, he certainly was now. Erwin could have been sleeping off an insanely busy week of work, or better yet, he could have been not at home at all _. Or_ , Makoto realised, he could have had someone over, someone like Makoto who he slept with because he was an adult who made his own adult decisions and--

"Makoto?" Erwin peered out at his front doorstep, brow furrowed in confusion over the sight of Makoto standing there, swaying on his heels a little. Makoto stood there for a moment just taking him in, his broad chest and blonde hair, ruffled like he was just relaxing at home, the strong bridge of his nose and his blue eyes and his hands, those bony knuckles, the size of those _fingers,_ and what they felt like inside of him--

Makoto fell forward and into his arms. " _Fuck me,_ " he breathed, making sure to aim it right at the shell of the other's ear, which he then took into his mouth.

"Makoto," Erwin said again, confusion beginning to wane in his tone. Makoto didn't miss the way his tone strained, the way his hands gripped tight on the former's back. Makoto tilted his head and nipped at the square line of Erwin's jaw, tracing it with his tongue and letting his hot breath chase after the sensation. "Please, Erwin," he said, letting a whine escape into his tone.

Erwin pulled him into the apartment and shut the door. Before Makoto could even fathom what was happening, before he could make sense of the situation or the spinning of his head, he was being slammed against a wall adjacent to the door, and Erwin's tongue was in his mouth, his knee sliding between Makoto's thighs.

Makoto moaned into his mouth like he was drowning.

Erwin pulled away from the kiss and looked at Makoto with a hot, dark gaze. "You're drunk," he said, his tone like a creeping storm. Makoto nodded, not denying it, lips parted and swollen.

Erwin's gaze darkened. "Makoto--"

"I want it," he begged, clinging at the other's shirt again, eyes wild. "Please. I won't regret it in the morning, Erwin. I want you. Wanted you all week--"

Erwin shut him up with a kiss again, surging his body against Makoto's. Makoto felt himself melt against it, moaning like he meant it, moaning like he was dying, moaning like he couldn't stop. All those feeling he had been stamping down on were crashing wildly now, threatening to choke him, threatening to smother the both of them. All his anguish at getting over Haru, all his stress over work and school and exams, all his confusion over what he felt for Erwin--

He pulled away from the kiss panting, face in Erwin's neck. "Punish me," he gasped out.

Erwin pushed him away and looked him in the eye. "Punish you?"

Makoto nodded, head spinning. "Please," he added, licking his lip.

Erwin seemed to decide for a second before he peeled Makoto from the wall, guiding him in the direction of the bedroom. Makoto eagerly went, sitting down on the bed only to be pulled up again by Erwin. Before he knew what was happening he was seated across the other's lap, his pants being pulled down over his hips and his dick trapped, frictionless, against Erwin's leg.

"You're sure?" Erwin asked again. Makoto realised what he was asking, could feel his hand hovering on the small of his back, the nerves there singing out at the contact. Biting his lip, he nodded.

The first slap of skin on skin was more shocking than the actual sensation of the slap. Makoto gasped out, his breath sharp in the dim room. Erwin waited, waited for him to recover, hand hovering over the buzzing, raw feeling of Makoto's exposed ass. He struck him again. Before the sting could even register this time he was hitting him again, and again, and Makoto finally let out a broken moan, sinking his head down to pant into the bedsheets. He could feel himself gradually hardening and leaking against Erwin's pants, probably staining them, shit, but he couldn't bring himself to stop.

"More," he panted, when Erwin let him take another break.

The next slap forced a garbled cry out of him.

"Yeah," Erwin said, speaking for the first time. "You like that, don't you?" He struck Makoto again, forcing a cry out of the man's lungs.

"Such a slut. You like being punished."

"Erwin," he said, voice bordering on a sob. He was close, so _frustrated,_ and if only Erwin would reach down and free his dick where it was trapped--

_ Slap. _

"What exactly am I punishing you for, Makoto?" _Slap._ "Showing up here when you'd been drinking, wanting me?" _Slap._ "Jerking off all week when you thought about me? You can't help it, can you? So desperate for it." The next slap that came was harder than the rest, and Makoto squirmed in his lap, achingly hard now.

Erwin pulled away from him, helping him to sit up. He took his thumb and forefinger and guided Makoto forward by the chin, close enough to kiss him but hardly daring. "You want me to fuck you?" he breathed. His expression didn't change at Makoto's eager nodding. "How bad do you want it, baby?"

"Please," Makoto gasped out, knowing how needy he sounded and not caring, just needing Erwin in him now-- not even now, five minutes ago--

Erwin was suddenly gone, moving to the side of the room. He was back before Makoto could panic with a small bottle of lube and a condom, a familiar sight that sent his stomach swooping again. Erwin handed him the lube, taking his seat again.

"Get yourself ready," he said, and although his tone was firm there was something else there, something strained and edging on desperate that Makoto couldn't ignore. Lowering his lashes, Makoto took the tube and got to work, making a show of it, kissing at the corner of Erwin's mouth and needing the attention more than anything, teasing himself on purpose by acting shy of his own prostate and working himself open in a shivering burn. When he felt he was ready he nodded at Erwin, who he expected to flip him straight onto his back. Instead, Erwin just looked at him.

"Well?" he said, crossing his arms in front of his chest. "Go on, then."

It took Makoto a moment to realise what he wanted. Nerves almost set in when he did realise, but thankfully, the alcohol was still there to urge him on, make him desperate for it.

Makoto scrambled to get Erwin's pants undone, and eventually Erwin stepped in to help, guiding the other's hand away to position himself firmly, slide the condom on, and hold himself in place for Makoto. Makoto was already salivating at the thought of it, his cock spilling precum all down his stomach as he got up on his knees and positioned himself in Erwin's lap. Working his hips over, he slowly slid himself down Erwin's length.

The stretch was immense this time, a different angle to what he was used to. It seemed to hit him so _deep_ this time, the stretch a delicious burn that sent perfect little sparks all up his spine. When he was all the way down he held still, shuddering.

"You can move," Erwin said gently, and at the tone of his voice, Makoto looked up. There was some concern there, concern for his wellbeing, for his comfort, and Erwin's hand against his hip was gentle and coaxing. _You can move._ Meeting his lips in a messy kiss, Makoto did.

He threaded his arms around Erwin's neck and rode him, all the desperation and neediness from before resurfacing in a haze of want and need. He tried to turn his face into Erwin's neck but most likely just ended up at his ear instead, positioned to moan right where the other man could hear it, moving like he couldn't get enough.

"That's it," Erwin gasped, his fingers vices against Makoto's hips. "That's it, baby, yeah. Make yourself feel good."

Makoto whined, moving a little faster now, grinding down where it felt good. He felt so deep, so-- "So full, _so_ full, Erwin, ah." Erwin was busy kneading at his ass, occasionally spreading him and craning his neck down to see the place where they met, the place where he was inside of Makoto, where they were joined.

"Yeah?" Erwin panted, sounding at his breaking point himself. "Tell me how it feels, Makoto."

"You're so _big,_ " he gasped, knowing it sounded like an obvious stroke to Erwin's ego but unable to help himself, so desperate for it he was close to crying. "Oh God-- _ah,_ Erwin, feels so good, so much-- so _deep, aahh-- please,_ please don't stop--"

Erwin reached his breaking point. Gripping Makoto's hips, he started to meet his downward thrusts with upward ones of his own, slamming into Makoto so hard that his vision went blurry every time he sunk down, shuddering rolling through him at full force. He clung to Erwin needily, whining in his ear, knowing his moans sounded more like mewls and not caring, hardly even aware that the noises he was hearing were coming from him. He just knew that he needed more of Erwin, _more,_ that he needed it now, that he was-- he was going to--

"--come, Erwin, I'm gonna-- ah-- _ah_ \--"

His moan was cut short with a kiss, Erwin's tongue hot and heavy and, crying out into his mouth, Makoto came.

.

When he woke up the next morning, he was in Erwin's bed.

Someone (Erwin) had tucked him in, and Makoto woke pleasantly in a pile of blankets softer than Heaven. The headache, however, was less than pleasant.

Through the splitting pain that was now throbbing through the walls of his skull, Makoto registered that Erwin's side of the bed was rumpled but cold, meaning he'd probably left it a while ago. He sat up, cradling his head in both hands and groaning.

Slowly, last night's events came back to him.

"Why," he said, just that, just one word, out loud to himself. It wasn't as if he hadn't known what he was doing, but the embarrassment hadn't been there. Well, it certainly was now, hitting him at full blast with his own neediness and _clinginess._ He'd breached _so many_ boundaries last night, that was for sure. Showing up in the middle of the night, clinging to Erwin like they were a _thing--_

Makoto turned to the bedside table to find a bottle of water, his salvation. It hit him in that moment just how dry his throat felt, raw and closed up. He chugged the water like his life depended on it. Next he registered the packet of aspirin that had been left for him, and the note. Popping a little pill into his mouth, he squinted at Erwin's handwriting.

_ Makoto, _ it said. _I had to go out for something work related; I won't be back until later. I left you aspirin and there's breakfast on the stove which should still be hot. If you need something to wear, you are free to go through the contents of my wardrobe at your leisure. You're probably hungover. Feel better soon. I'll call you tonight._

_ Erwin. _

Makoto put his head in both hands and groaned.

After a quick scope of the kitchen, Makoto discovered that there was, in fact, breakfast on the stove, and that it was still hot, so he sat and ate it at Erwin's dining table while he waited for his headache to lessen. He flipped through coat hanger after coat hanger of blazers and suit pants before giving up and digging through one of the messier drawers near where Erwin kept his socks, eventually deciding on an old, slightly ratty t-shirt with the name of a Western band scrawled across it in English that didn't look like it even belonged in the same house as Erwin. Gathering the rest of his clothes up into a pile, along with his phone, and his shame, Makoto headed home.

Haru didn't look up when he walked through the door. "Rin said you'd be hungover."

"Did he," Makoto said back, sounding hungover.

"You need to call him."

"Sure, I will."

Haru paused the movie he was watching and turned around to look at Makoto. Makoto didn't want to think about the mess he was seeing, though he must have been seeing it. Haru waved him over. Sighing, Makoto went to sit down.

Haru felt his temperature as if he was nursing a cold. "You look like shit," he deadpanned. Swearing was rare for Haru, so Makoto winced.

"Thank you," he said, trying to joke. Haru's expression didn't change.

"Were you at Erwin's house?"

"Yes," he said, not hiding it.

"You were drunk."

"Hardly. I was tipsy and careless. I caught an uber."

"He reimbursed you, then," Haru said, raising his eyebrows. It took Makoto a moment to realise he was joking.

They sat there in silence for a moment, Makoto nursing his headache and Haru going back to the movie, which was some family drama about a whale, or something. After what felt like eons, Haru turned back to look at him.

"I know you had feelings for me," he said, expression not giving away any of his feelings. Makoto nodded.

"I know."

"And you knew I didn't feel the same way."

That hurt less than Makoto had thought it would. He nodded again. "Yes."

Haru sucked in a breath. "I'm sorry," he said, eventually. "That I'm not interested in that kind of thing."

"I knew you weren't," Makoto said, grinning at him affectionately, and finally it felt so right between them, so natural to talk about it. "You're my best friend, so of course I notice things like that. Why are we talking about this now, Haru?"

Haru paused, looking unsure of himself. "Because... you have feelings for Erwin, don't you?"

The smile disappeared from Makoto's face. "I'm not--"

"You're terrible with feelings. You spend so much time worrying about other people, but you hardly ever stop and consider your own. You're scared of yourself, aren't you?"

Makoto didn't know how to answer. He was. He was terrified.

Haru looked content with himself, turning back to face the movie with his usual expression. "I think you should tell him," he said, "or at least bring it up. I think he has feelings for you, too."

"Haru, no offense, but you're not exactly... the first person I would ask about this kind of thing."

Haru almost smiled. "Well, I notice people, even though you seem to think that I don't. And that Erwin guy hates me."

"Haru--"

"Because he likes you, Makoto. So you should talk to him."

Makoto said nothing to that. For once, he didn't even know how to respond.

.

Erwin waited at the beach until he felt satisfied with his thoughts, a little clearer now in the fresh air of the Sunday morning. He had left Makoto asleep in his head to wake up to what was sure to be the biggest hangover the world had ever seen. Hopefully, he reasoned, the breakfast had fixed it a little, but there was no telling.

Ah, well, he figured. He'd have to be well enough. He'd decided it was now; do or die.

_ can we talk? _ he sent, thumbs hovering over the buttons to send a follow-up text, but reigning in his self-control, he stopped. Erwin had no idea how relationships worked, but maybe Makoto didn't, either. And maybe, for once in his adult life, that was a good thing. That he was walking into the dark with someone who couldn't see their way around, either.

As put-together as he made himself seem, sometimes, Erwin had no idea what in the Hell he was doing. That was fine with him.

His phone chimed with a text notification, barely a minute after he had sent his to Makoto.

_ i was actually going to suggest the same thing. :) _ it said, emoticon and all, and Erwin stood, smiling.

He was ready to talk to Makoto.


End file.
